5 Tips On Running Barefoot During The Zombie Apocalypse

Written By Barefoot Dawsy

One thing I’ve learned from reading my Twitter feed this week is that the Zombie Apocalypse is just around the corner. Obviously if (when) the zombie hordes eventually arrive in your home town, you will need to know how to maintain your barefoot lifestyle despite the swarming undead. At first glance, many would think that bare feet and zombies don’t mix, however, there are a number of things that you can do to minimise the risk of infection/being eaten/zombification on your next run.

1. Run During The Day

As a barefoot runner, it is essential to be aware of your surroundings. This is never more true than when zombies have been sighted in your neighbourhood. The presence of zombies has been shown to increase the likelihood of encountering broken glass, entrails, and bullet casings. By running during the day, you will be able to more easily spot and avoid these obstacles, and weave through the slow-moving reanimated folks that crowd your favourite route.

2. Carry Water

Under normal circumstances, ducking out for a quick 5k wouldn’t normally require you to carry any additional water. During times of zombie plague, however, it’s really important to ensure that you take some supplies with you. There’s nothing more embarrassing than returning home after a run to find it overrun with the undead, leading you to ultimately waste away of dehydration. Be prepared, bring at least a litre of water with you, and it can never hurt to throw a couple of energy bars in your pockets while you’re at it!

3. Avoid Crowds

You thought the comments by strangers about your Vibrams were annoying? Well imagine how much more irritating it will be to get torn limb from limb, or get caught in the crossfire of some rescue operation. The easiest way to do this is to avoid noisy places. A simple rhyme to remember what to do is “Moaning and Gunfire are simply no Fun, the other direction is the way I will Run”.

4. Try Some Cross Training

There’s nothing worse than pulling a muscle, straining a tendon or even fracturing a toe while running, and this is doubly true when a zombie has picked up your scent. By training your body for any situation, you will reduce your chances of injury and improve your chances of surviving the Zombocalypse. Great recommendations are parkour, cycling, swimming and hand-to-hand combat.

5. Embrace The Inevitable

The zombification of your city, however disappointing, can actually be a real boon for the barefoot runner. Once a tipping point has been reached and there are more zombies than living humans around, you’ll have your run (pun intended) of the city. Imagine the freedom of running where you want, when you want, even down the middle of once-busy streets! Add to this the opportunity to eliminate with impunity those people that so cleverly called out ‘run Forrest run’ at you before they were a zombie, and you’re having the time of your life!

In conclusion, don’t let the zombies get you down! Prepare early, keep your head on your shoulders, and you too can make barefoot running a big part of the zombiefied future!

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3 Responses to 5 Tips On Running Barefoot During The Zombie Apocalypse

  1. Popped over here from the NF zombie thread. Loved it, you have an awesome sense of humor!

  2. Pingback: The Dirt on Barefooting and Prepping | Survival Sherpa

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